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I'm a 30-something wife and mom. My boys are my pride and joy. Together, we are navigating being a forever family post international adoption.

Friday, November 14, 2014

Why Did We Adopt Part 3 - Why did we adopt internationally?

For Part 1, see here...

For Part 2, see here...

Once Hubby and I decided to look into adoption I turned to Google, like any millennial would. I learned that most private domestic adoptions are of infants. Many older children in need a family in our region are in the foster care system* and not available to be adopted. So domestic adoption wasn't in the cards.

After talking, Hubby and I decided to investigate international adoption. My search lead me from a federal site to a regional site to a list of approved adoption agencies. I decided to check out the websites of those that were located in our area.

I came across an agency in our city that had been operating successfully in multiple countries for about a decade. Hubby and I both have familial ties to one of these countries. There are also local schools, clubs, and shops run by descendants and immigrants of the culture.

I think a big part of adopt internationally is honoring the country from which you are hoping to adopt. Having resources in out community made it so much easier to choose the country we did.

This particular adoption agency was offering a one-day class for prospective adoptive parents in a few weeks, so Hubby and I signed up. It was very informative and also gave us a chance to feel out the agency and ask lots of questions.

The idea of an older child was solidified as we learned that international adoption is not the road to take if you are hoping for a young, healthy child. Many countries have moved away from allowing such kids to be adopted internationally as there are local people willing to adopt, foster or otherwise care for them in their birth countries. Most children available for international adoption are older, have serious health conditions, or both.

By the end of the weekend, we were comfortable and confident in making a decision on how to go about growing our family. There was no more research needed, we had found what we had been looking for.

So, that is how we decided to adopt internationally, picked our country and found our agency. Next came the beginning of the story before the beginning of the real story.

*It isn't impossible to adopt from foster care, there are children in need of a forever family. Also, I have so much respect and admiration for friends and acquaintances who are foster parents. I don't want to shed a negative light on fostering in any way. We just didn't feel it was right for our family at the time. 

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